I am 20 years old, and Ive been on and off with my boyfriend since we were both 13. My boyfriend had proposed me to marry him on 3rd month dating.. then he was stressed up with his business he didnt know how to handle .. i started helping him and give him directions.. he was getting through in a good way ,though at times i had to push him as he haf started giving up.. but then he broke up with me while am at my work place .. it was terrible..but i couldnt let my personal issues interfere with my work i locked the door of my office and kept on working with tears.. three months later he comes back .. but again he hasnt mentioned he needs a favour .. but he kinda mentioned about something that i was helping him out with telated to his business.. i offered him help yet lol.., and the matter is going well on his favour and he has pulled off again.. bi communication.. am glad i had asked him once if he just came around cause he wanted favour.. he said he still have strong feelings for me.. but deep inside i know he is just using. Like hes not gonna change. Not texting me as often, not asking when we are going to hangout again. I am an emotional person and I tend to cry. Are circumstances in your boyfriends life affecting how he relates to you and others? It made me sad, I didnt even hear from him all weekend and then he tells me he misses me. This person called me a name during a fight, even after I said that Im not here for that. Me and my partner have been together 5 years. I know youre ignoring me, but I just want to know why or what I did to you? If you Maybe hes coping with financial problems in his professional or personal life, or grieving the los of someone he loves. However, if my boyfriend was gaming with another girl I would have broken up with him. He wanted to hang out everyday which at first I though was strange but I started to so after while it was weird for both of us to not be around each other every day. Maybe if you dont hear from him send him a positive text that you are thinking of him but let him come to you. So I dug in my heels, and he had a stressful day at work, so it ended with him yelling that I was bipolar and he needed a break before I left and he went back to work. I get 2-3 texts a day and I have to call him every few days just to hear his voice. Hi girl, Im in the same situation right now. Either speak up about these things or get out of that relationship. Also he always respond but hes texting less. He assumed I wanted an argument for asking him to take the bin out. Especially no Valentines or birthday. He has lost interest in everything. I have been with my boyfriend for one and a half years. and he would say yeah we should, and then nothing. HE SAYS IT ISNT A BIG DEAL. He Wants You To Approach Him First. A couple weeks ago, we went to a show which was our first date in a long time. He broke up with me because I was becoming emotionally unavailable and I always cried when I was with him. I can say that he is the kind of guy who only knows how to love me through his words and not by his actions. I try to do something positive and you piss on it. But whatever. Then, youll know what to do when your boyfriend makes no effort in your relationship. Im pretty sure hell tell me I cant really go because its just an alumni weekend. years later, i went to my facebook to unblock some people in my list, including him. And the only way we can get closer is by communicating as much as we can. He was pursuing and attentive at first, expressed that he wanted a committed monogamous relationship, and did little things like bringing me gifts, making sure I had water at night when I stayed over, giving me a sweatshirt of his to wear in the morning, just little attentive kind things. My fiance, my 12 year old son, and i have been living together a second time(in his house). We got in a fight because I said I was upset because he hadnt made time for me in the last week. Does Your Life Feel Pointless Without a Relationship? Ive told him why I need contact to stay connected to each other n to feel secure n have fun. I have no friends no interest in men, I cant even stand it when strangers try to talk to me. I tried talking to him about it and he was very dismissive with just an okay, I have been dating my boyfriend for over 3years now but he hasnt prioritized me..his family always comes first, whereas i do the most work, im there for him emotionally, physically financially sometimesbut I always come last on his list he is a good guy and he respects me and all but im jst tired cos he doesnt spend on me.Then i met another guy who will give me his eyeballs as soon as i ask for them but he is very disrespectful and selfish wen it comes to my feelings.. he is always the right one.. if I complain of being ignored till his convenience he jst ignores me some more and comes back to say Im sorry babe i love you and thats it..I really dont know what to do.. please help me. I try to help him to make it easier for him since I know he has a lot on his plate but he doesnt seem to notice that. You only care about yourself, youre lazy out of anger.. which it catches up to me and makes me awful because I know his lack of energy plays a large part of it but how am I supposed to feel or do.. to make it even better he recently told me after a large fight about laundry or something I barely remember, that hes decided to go for traveling nursing in California this spring because he will make more Money (something he is very stressed out about) and I dont know what to do because thats not part of our plan. However, I do know something that will help immensely. He has made me realize a lot of my flaws and made me seek my inner self to understand why I am the way I am. I have tried so many times to let the relationship go and have broken up with him, but he does not want to let me go. ?pretty much hurts and also my first. Weve been together for 5 years. Ive been with my bf for almost two years and my biggest issue is the alcoholIve been told its not a problem and that he does love me.any suggestions. Just a text. I am often not successful but I realized in the last 1-2 years, it is him. i think if i knew he wasnt capable of doing these things i wouldnt feel so strongly. Write in your journal or diary, or share in the comments section below. He also always texts me daily, and he is generally the one to text first, and always responds to my texts immediately. He truly sucks, im sorry but you need to leave him. I may be demanding at times but I definitely know I deserve more than the effort hes willing to put in. Here are 5 reasons he stopped texting you: 1. Hes going to party for his birthday but couldnt do anything special for me today, especially after everything I do for him. He never brought it up again so I decided time to move on, clearly he is not interested. ? Like WTF is your goal, here, exactly? ? I love my boyfriend so much, weve been together for a year now. It doesnt matter what words youre saying, the message is clear: I will tolerate this, as long as you let me explain repeatedly why I dont agree with it. The most important lesson Ive learned from my love life is this: My role is to set boundaries. Crazy! He keeps telling me that if I think relationships are only about anniversaries and dates, giving each other a label, cheesy stuff, then for him it isnt meaningful. My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year. his excuse of not having quality time? He always makes his schedules according to his friends schedules and if I wanna spend any time with him I have to change my schedules. yes I did give myself to him.he was my first.. and it was the second time I snuck out but I did everything for him and I get ignored. Leaving a person you love is one of the hardest things to do. But he reminds me almost daily that he thinks Im lazy and should be working at if Im not in school. All of the sudden he said hes not into texting. NO AFFECTION. Hes now making $175k a year plus an extra $5000/mo retainer as a consultant with his old job. My boyfriend and me zoomed and emailed and he moved from job to job. He feels sex is for marriage. The littlest things set him off, and me as well. Or stay here and break up. Whereas if I was in his situation I would just leave (not during the lockdown). We dont even hug or kiss anymore because people have always yelled PDA! (Stupid high schoolers) so now he wont do any of it. Instead of wishing things were different, practice accepting the fact that you cant change your boyfriend or make him want to spend time with you. My bestfriend just wanted to get me with someone so she picked her friend and I told her that I needed to get to know him first and not rush into a relationship so me and this guy stayed up for 24 hours on ft and we kinda just clicked he told me he liked me and I sort of liked him but I told him I still wanted to just keep talking so we did and he was so impatient he just wanted to ask me out so a week later I was like sure and we started dating. Now we seem so disconnected. Or do I allow that this person has already shown me who they are, and leave? The bonus to this approach? That night at 1 am I snuck out and had his sis pick me up. This past year has been a struggle, and I dont know what it means. Instead of being apologetic or understanding how disappointed I was, naturally he got mad because Im never happy and hes tired of just being here for when I want something so as you can imagine its now Sat night and it never happened because now hes mad at me for demanding things and pouting when I dont get my way. I love my girlfriend but I never know what to say to her. But I always gave him the benefit of the doubt. Let him come to you. Can anyone help me and give me some advice? The first two years of the relationship he was wonderful. He was fine with it so we just started to say it to each other. I have asked him on several occasions to make more of an effort but it ends up in an argument. Need. Been with my a few years. This guy is not considerate at all and does not have your best interest at heart. I think the best thing to do would be to withdraw and give him space. hed text at 11-1am for me, but by then i would have fallen asleep. I recently just been promoted to a great job.. Follow these tips on what to do when he stops calling and texting you. he briefly mentioned his bad experience with exes, he had two years marriage and he said he felt it was too long. I forgot the bin was being collected and it was due to arrive in a few hours, he didnt take it out. We are doing thanksgiving together. (this actually backfired) and caused huge tension and we nearly broke up several times, but when i tried to give him more space to understand his situation, my worst fears came true because we started talking less and less. I understand exactly where youre coming from. And thats what messes with me a lotwhy doesnt he want to do the same for me. I used to brag up the fact that he was one of those guys who would actually reply to all of a lengthy message so to speak but lately he ignores a lot of whats said as if he just doesnt care. I'm Laurie, creator of Uprooted She Blossoms and author of Growing Forward When You Can't Go Back. We did this at least once a week. I just now accidentally found this article and my rather lengthy comment. He said hes tired or too busy. He said he was torn and worried about Coronavirus. I really love him but he is not doing anything to build connections. Me and him didnt talk all day but that didnt matter at first cause he slept while i went to school but then he started to sleep at night like a normal person and so I would go to school and ft him right when school got out and we would fall asleep on ft together. Then we were living in different countries. WebHe came up to me and brought me free drinks again. He barely calls me back when he sees my miss calls,i talked to him about it,he told me he is just stressed up with work.. Now he tries to call me at night or text me before he sleeps,he returns my calls,but things are not like before.. I would put makeup on and wait hours for him to finish his video games, only for him to tell me hes sorry he got caught up, but hes tired and doesnt have time. He doesnt check up on me to see if Im okay or if I get home okay, and it just hurts me that he never wants to spend time with me when were out drinking with our friends? He is highly smart so I am not going to spell it out for him. He might end up resenting you, instead. If I dont ask him are we seeing each other today? He does have some medical issues, but seems to be taking care of most of them, he also says he does suffer from depression and I am wondering if this is what is happening. That bothers me because on his birthday I did get him a little something and also, called his sister to get his favorite chocolate cake and chocolate icing recipe of his moms who is deceased. He reminds me often how he is in charge and makes me pay the price for his past decisions by living in a place he cannot afford alone, even though when he asked me to move here he never expected me to pay half because I dont make alot of money. Were both divorced. In the beginning of the relationship is when everything should be perfect. If, however, your boyfriend really has lost interest in you, then you may have to be painfully honest with yourself. Theres a reason why the Geneva Convention bans sleep deprivation as torture What you need to do is make time to get a little bit of rest (and youll actually find that you will become more productive with a little rest too and not have to spend so much time lacking sleep). Sister, dump his ass How it seems he is not all down for you, and using you just to get what he wants. Then I come home to him sleeping in bed. So Im telling myself to just treat him like an acquaintance and move on with my life, but still find myself getting triggered on the daily by this baffling behavior. I love him dearly, but no lie Im confused & I dont like feeling confused. I randomly always try to put efforts in the relationship but get nothing in return. Yesterday he said he had tried to write in his journal in the morning but it was took dark and did not want to wake me. He has changed massively and does not do any of those things now. Hello Crystal, I am very interested in what you have said, do you mind to give more details please? I got to see him in person for the first time and we were in love. I asked about the plan we made and he didnt answer he started to be mean to me and not talk and then he hung up on me after saying he wasnt gonna go to hoco with me or prom and that he didnt love me. Maybe he will brush his teeth at lunchtime but often he just smells like armpits and looks like a scruff and then wants to come to our clean bed that way. Ive been dating Wes for about 6-7 months. Does your boyfriend still care? This past week, I got strep throat and was miserable, so I didnt do anything, and since I got antibiotics, Ive been feeling better, but Im debating on doing anything to show him how much I do and how little he does. Me and my boyfriend are reaching our 2 year anniversary and I dont know how I feel anymore, hes changed. A couple passing times of the day, well meet just for a couple minutes. But it hasnt. I got upset and she said she was done being friends with me so yeah that happened. so I do have to take that into account, and when his parents go away for the summer its wayyyy easier to spend more time with him, he becomes so laid back. Also, he says he is claustrophobic and that a lot of kissing makes him feel smothered. Wanting me to be available for him. 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